| Life Coaching |
| Massage by Cathy Kline 933 High Street, Suite 100-B Worthington, Ohio 43085 614-296-8292 cathy@massagebycathykline.com |
| Private Sessions or Group Lectures |
"When Your Beliefs Cover Up the Real You"
What are we here for? What purpose is this human time we spend on earth? Is there a vast plan
we are all participating in? Are we just pawns in a game? Do we really have any control? Or....do we
really create our own reality? Do we really have free choice? Is this God we talk about, think about
and pray to....really as wonderful as we would like to imagine? What if He is? What if He really did
create us in His own image? What if we are living, laughing, loving, hurting, feeling and experiencing
by choice? What if God is experiencing these things we call “life’s experiences” right along with us?
What if life is “a matter of opinion”? What if we are all here to live, laugh, love, hurt, feel and
experience? What if all of this is controlled by our attitude? What if we have a choice of our
attitude about every single thing that takes place on this earth?
Way back in the 80's when I was raising three children and a husband, I didn’t believe there were
any real choices about anything. I use the word believe. What is a belief? A belief is an implied
acceptance of a thing to be true or real. Belief implies acceptance with or without certainty. So we
gain a belief by hearing or reading a thing, over and over again until we adopt it into our brain and
use that belief to guide the running of our life. Then there is knowing. I understand knowing to be
something that you feel inside your very being. There are things that you know that you know that
you know, like a gut feeling. Big difference between believing and knowing.
So back when I was raising my family, I disallowed the knowing and stuck with the beliefs I was
told to believe. Times back then for me were often so overwhelming, I would just sit and cry. I could
not understand why things were happening to me that were so unfair. Wasn’t I the best wife and
mother that was earthly possible? Didn’t I do everything properly? I was room mother, girl scout
leader, dressed the girl’s Barbie dolls, stacked up the Lego blocks, cooked, cleaned, canned, did the
yard work, got up at 5:00 a.m. to fix husband’s breakfast, pack his lunch, etc, etc, etc. If I was doing
everything right, then why wasn’t my husband happy? Why did he yell about everything I did wrong?
Why did he get angry and push, shove, slap, scream and scare the hell out of kids and me? Why was
everything the kids and I did....wrong?
Back then I believed everything my husband told me was true. I probably believed him, because he
so believed what he said. He convinced me that I was lazy, stupid, forgetful, average looking and
pretty much incapable of being successful with anything I did. Like the times we would sit down to
dinner and I would forget to put the salt and pepper on the table. He would be furious. Once I let
the butcher slice the lunch meat too thick. He threatened me to take the meat back and have it sliced
properly. More than once, I left the light on in the utility room where we stored paint and other
junk. He threw a fit, claiming the light could have gotten too hot, caused a fire and burned down the
entire house. How could I be so stupid? So incompetent? So awful?
It’s funny today when I think back, but I used to actually pray to God and ask him to help me be a
better person. I would ask him why I was so forgetful and careless. Why couldn’t I do things right,
so my husband wouldn’t get angry all the time?
Perception is a funny thing, isn’t it? I was one of those women who made our life look perfect on
the outside, while I was dying on the inside. Wasn’t that the proper thing to do?
One day while preparing for my daughter’s birthday party, a friend stopped over. She asked if
there was anything she could do to help. I was shocked, as no one had ever offered to help me that I
could recall. As it happened, the guest list had grown larger than I originally planned and I didn’t
think the cake I had prepared would be large enough. I had the cake mix, the icing, the cupcake
papers and the tin laid out, but no time to fix the cupcakes. Mary said she would be happy to take
the stuff to her house and bake the cupcakes for me. I expressed my gratitude to her and shared
with her that I rarely experienced anyone offering to help me, even though at times I felt lost and
overwhelmed. Mary said, “You know why people don’t offer, don’t you?” Of course, I had no clue. She
continued, “Because you appear to be so organized and together, people would not begin to believe
you ever needed any help!”
Well, that sure was an awakening for me. One of many to come over the next few years. There
even came the wonderful day when I realized it was my husband who was dependent on me, instead of
me being dependent on him. Several times when things got real tough, I would go to a minister and ask
for help. They would all say the same thing. “Pray to love your husband again.” So I would pray to
love him and I would temporarily forget, but it never lasted for long. He would be mean, I would be
hurt and lost and I finally realized the ministers’ advice was all messed up. Not even God would want
me to continue living like this. After sixteen and a half years of tears, one night I had him arrested,
thrown in jail, and I filed for divorce the next morning. When I called my mom from the courthouse,
all she could do was cry and say “Thank God!” That was back in 1989. Wow, has my perception of life
changed since then!
Back then I thought I was a victim. I believed in marriage for better or worse, or worse, or
worse. I believed that if I divorced my husband, I would die in hell ( and I’m not even Catholic).
Today, I know better. Are you beginning to see the difference between Believing and Knowing?
Today so many of us are caught up in our belief systems. I am not saying it is wrong to have
beliefs, but when we overlook and ignore the true knowing from within, then maybe it is time to take
a strong look at what we believe and why. When we allow ourselves to get out of our heads and into
our hearts, we see the world through different eyes.
That’s where the attitude we talked about earlier comes in. Our attitude is the way we perceive
and respond to any given experience. Did you notice I said respond instead of react? Responding
puts us in a place of being responsible instead of reacting which can be a quick action to any given
situation. Then we add choice to attitude, and wow, what a great combination! We can choose to be
offended, hurt or angry with a situation or we can choose to look at things from another perspective
to understand our experiences. We can get out of our heads and into our hearts. Out of our heads
where the programmed tapes or beliefs play over and over again and into our hearts where we start
feeling what we truly know inside.
By Cathy Kline
What are we here for? What purpose is this human time we spend on earth? Is there a vast plan
we are all participating in? Are we just pawns in a game? Do we really have any control? Or....do we
really create our own reality? Do we really have free choice? Is this God we talk about, think about
and pray to....really as wonderful as we would like to imagine? What if He is? What if He really did
create us in His own image? What if we are living, laughing, loving, hurting, feeling and experiencing
by choice? What if God is experiencing these things we call “life’s experiences” right along with us?
What if life is “a matter of opinion”? What if we are all here to live, laugh, love, hurt, feel and
experience? What if all of this is controlled by our attitude? What if we have a choice of our
attitude about every single thing that takes place on this earth?
Way back in the 80's when I was raising three children and a husband, I didn’t believe there were
any real choices about anything. I use the word believe. What is a belief? A belief is an implied
acceptance of a thing to be true or real. Belief implies acceptance with or without certainty. So we
gain a belief by hearing or reading a thing, over and over again until we adopt it into our brain and
use that belief to guide the running of our life. Then there is knowing. I understand knowing to be
something that you feel inside your very being. There are things that you know that you know that
you know, like a gut feeling. Big difference between believing and knowing.
So back when I was raising my family, I disallowed the knowing and stuck with the beliefs I was
told to believe. Times back then for me were often so overwhelming, I would just sit and cry. I could
not understand why things were happening to me that were so unfair. Wasn’t I the best wife and
mother that was earthly possible? Didn’t I do everything properly? I was room mother, girl scout
leader, dressed the girl’s Barbie dolls, stacked up the Lego blocks, cooked, cleaned, canned, did the
yard work, got up at 5:00 a.m. to fix husband’s breakfast, pack his lunch, etc, etc, etc. If I was doing
everything right, then why wasn’t my husband happy? Why did he yell about everything I did wrong?
Why did he get angry and push, shove, slap, scream and scare the hell out of kids and me? Why was
everything the kids and I did....wrong?
Back then I believed everything my husband told me was true. I probably believed him, because he
so believed what he said. He convinced me that I was lazy, stupid, forgetful, average looking and
pretty much incapable of being successful with anything I did. Like the times we would sit down to
dinner and I would forget to put the salt and pepper on the table. He would be furious. Once I let
the butcher slice the lunch meat too thick. He threatened me to take the meat back and have it sliced
properly. More than once, I left the light on in the utility room where we stored paint and other
junk. He threw a fit, claiming the light could have gotten too hot, caused a fire and burned down the
entire house. How could I be so stupid? So incompetent? So awful?
It’s funny today when I think back, but I used to actually pray to God and ask him to help me be a
better person. I would ask him why I was so forgetful and careless. Why couldn’t I do things right,
so my husband wouldn’t get angry all the time?
Perception is a funny thing, isn’t it? I was one of those women who made our life look perfect on
the outside, while I was dying on the inside. Wasn’t that the proper thing to do?
One day while preparing for my daughter’s birthday party, a friend stopped over. She asked if
there was anything she could do to help. I was shocked, as no one had ever offered to help me that I
could recall. As it happened, the guest list had grown larger than I originally planned and I didn’t
think the cake I had prepared would be large enough. I had the cake mix, the icing, the cupcake
papers and the tin laid out, but no time to fix the cupcakes. Mary said she would be happy to take
the stuff to her house and bake the cupcakes for me. I expressed my gratitude to her and shared
with her that I rarely experienced anyone offering to help me, even though at times I felt lost and
overwhelmed. Mary said, “You know why people don’t offer, don’t you?” Of course, I had no clue. She
continued, “Because you appear to be so organized and together, people would not begin to believe
you ever needed any help!”
Well, that sure was an awakening for me. One of many to come over the next few years. There
even came the wonderful day when I realized it was my husband who was dependent on me, instead of
me being dependent on him. Several times when things got real tough, I would go to a minister and ask
for help. They would all say the same thing. “Pray to love your husband again.” So I would pray to
love him and I would temporarily forget, but it never lasted for long. He would be mean, I would be
hurt and lost and I finally realized the ministers’ advice was all messed up. Not even God would want
me to continue living like this. After sixteen and a half years of tears, one night I had him arrested,
thrown in jail, and I filed for divorce the next morning. When I called my mom from the courthouse,
all she could do was cry and say “Thank God!” That was back in 1989. Wow, has my perception of life
changed since then!
Back then I thought I was a victim. I believed in marriage for better or worse, or worse, or
worse. I believed that if I divorced my husband, I would die in hell ( and I’m not even Catholic).
Today, I know better. Are you beginning to see the difference between Believing and Knowing?
Today so many of us are caught up in our belief systems. I am not saying it is wrong to have
beliefs, but when we overlook and ignore the true knowing from within, then maybe it is time to take
a strong look at what we believe and why. When we allow ourselves to get out of our heads and into
our hearts, we see the world through different eyes.
That’s where the attitude we talked about earlier comes in. Our attitude is the way we perceive
and respond to any given experience. Did you notice I said respond instead of react? Responding
puts us in a place of being responsible instead of reacting which can be a quick action to any given
situation. Then we add choice to attitude, and wow, what a great combination! We can choose to be
offended, hurt or angry with a situation or we can choose to look at things from another perspective
to understand our experiences. We can get out of our heads and into our hearts. Out of our heads
where the programmed tapes or beliefs play over and over again and into our hearts where we start
feeling what we truly know inside.
By Cathy Kline
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Life Coaching is about balancing emotional issues and coping with everyday stress.
Sometimes we just need someone safe to talk to without judgement or criticism who
may have common sense solutions to what feels like an overwhelming life problem.
If you would like a one-on-one session or have a group with a particular life issue you
would like to discuss, I invite you to call Cathy at 614-296-8292.
Read Article Below: "When Your Beliefs Cover up the Real You"
Other articles to be published soon:
"Does Simply Telling the Truth Really Work?"
"Always, Always, Always Choices"
"How Do I Get What I Want?"
"Life is a Matter of Opinion"
"Being Your Authentic Self"
Sometimes we just need someone safe to talk to without judgement or criticism who
may have common sense solutions to what feels like an overwhelming life problem.
If you would like a one-on-one session or have a group with a particular life issue you
would like to discuss, I invite you to call Cathy at 614-296-8292.
Read Article Below: "When Your Beliefs Cover up the Real You"
Other articles to be published soon:
"Does Simply Telling the Truth Really Work?"
"Always, Always, Always Choices"
"How Do I Get What I Want?"
"Life is a Matter of Opinion"
"Being Your Authentic Self"